Summer Holidays as a Sophomore

Should it be as a sophomore or a junior? I'm not entirely sure too. Technically I've completed my 2^nd year aka 4^th semester. But it is still the summer holidays. Well, whatever.

Post-Prelims Shit

Shall start this post with something cute:

This baby panda is soooo cute omgxz !!

It's probably how I look like now anyway.
Not the cute part, but the dark eye circles. Lol.

Okay, anyway.
So school started this week, or technically last friday.
And let me tell you it's fucking boring in school okay?
I find myself really lost sometimes like idk what to do next.
There's so much stuff to do and our schedule is so packed?!

Like normal lessons from 9amm-3/4/5pm ++
And if this is not enough teachers make us stay back for EXTRA supplementary.
Yes. It's on top of the supplementary allocated to each subjects fortnightly.
And then we have to come early for timed practice and what not.
Our school used to say we end lessons late because we start school late.
But seriously lo, we start only 1 hr later than other JCs, 2 hrs max; but we end school so much later?!
Somemore sometimes have to come back in the morning.
Lol. Fucking joke.

So tell me now what you want from me uh?
On average I wake up at 5am+, reach home 5/6pm+
I seriously already have very little time to consolidate and study,
and the school still give so much practice papers...
So how? Should I brush up on my basics and neglect all those piles of  papers?
Then end up getting scolded for not doing my work and giving the impression that's why I score badly.
I can't understand why they have to give us so much papers.
Especially for already weak students like me? ._.
Like dude, teachers,

You gotta use your damn brain.
Hais. I hate school :(
Can't wait for A's to end.
Until then I guess I'd be complaining and ranting alot here, lol.

On a happier note, I went out with 1215 girls after prelims for dinner ^^
Then the next day I head out with baby to town.
Shall blog about it another day.
Oh, and baby made me promise I'll study hard from now on.
And that's after he said I'm the slack-est girl he ever met. Tsk.
Have to go finish my math paper now. Sigh.

I feel sick; kinda feverish, heaty-ish, cold and everything shitty at the same fucking time.

是的，已经快到终点了，只要再坚持多一些。

All I wish for is ...

After chatting with someone, I've come to realise that all I wish for is a normal life. I don't need to be the best, I don't need to excel, I just need to live and be happy.

Some people may say I don't have 骨气, some might say I'm weak, others like boyf will just totally disagree with me. I mean, I don't blame them. I used to be like that, wanting to be the best in everything I do, to excel in my studies and my cca. That was back then... Those who have known and been with me long enough knows that I'm achieving less as time progresses. Lol. Well, let me just boast a little here okay? In primary school I used to be like quite good in my studies, got SYF award and I even made this scarf with my teacher for the PRESIDENT'S WIFE (YES I KNOW OMFG?!) Then in secondary school I did quite well in volleyball (2 zonals, 1 nationals placing I think) and all the sports day stuff. Now I'm all like failing every exams and tests. Yup, this is like a road to destruction lol.

But it's true that as I grow older, I find our education systems really screwed up and I don't really learn much useful stuff in the end. I thought it's the end result that's really important?!

Anyway, I've now realised that it's okay to not be the best. I mean, I admit I say that partly cos I'm not capable enough. (I mean, I really can't remember all those damn f-ing formulas and reagents and conditions and what not okay?! It's too much for my brain but I still can understand math problems okay? I'm not THAT bad yet but school is really boring D: Most of the time I look like this:



 But the more important reason is because I've realised I don't need to be the best, not even be great to be successful in life.

I don't need to be on honour roll, I don't need to score straight A's, I just need to know my goal and work towards it. I mean like, so what if you're the top scorer? It's not going to be reflected in your A levels cert right? Haha. I don't need to get straight A's to get into a business course, I don't need a scholarship too. So what's the point? I just need to do well enough what.

So right now all I need is to score enough to get into a business course in either NTU, NUS or SMU (Yes, it's impt that it'll be a public uni). And after that I'm going to work towards fulfilling my dream of starting my own business, yay! ^^

People and adults always ask me what business I want to start. I mean, I don't really know how to reply them? 80% of the time I give a different answer, hahah. Cause I REALLY don't know. Friends have also made suggestions to venture in the crafting field cause I make pretty gifts and cards (Yes, thank you and I'm not going to be all humble and say I'm not. But it doesn't mean I'm arrogant too!). I'll consider that too, but it all depends. I'm just going to see what's in and popular and sell that! That'll make me the most money, no? Like right now I tried selling a variety of stuff but the most hot selling are the inspired nb shoes. I also don't know why seriously. But if it makes my customers happy and it earns me money. Then well, why not! 

At this point some may say I'm not following my 'Be Happy' principle cause I'm just selling and setting up a business that makes me the most money but not what I love and want. But if you think again, whoever said you can only have 1 business? Nobody! I can sell something I like such as diy and craft stuffs, or some sweet treats or design and sell my own line of jewellery and apparels. At the same time I can just have a business that guarantees profit which I'll just oversee and leave the details and minor decisions to employees. So yup, I still can be happy and do what I love :D

Yes, I'm very ambitious. Hahahahah. I wana earn money, start a loving family and enjoy my life all at the same time. I don't really care what others think, really. Haters gonna hate and leave some bad comments D: Now all I have to do is to conquer A's lol. And even if I don't, I alrd have my backup plan up and going and yup, I'm determined to live my dreams. So f you haters.

So..... yup. Thanks for reading my really lengthy, out of point at times and quite nonsensical blogpost/rants. For those of you who aren't doing well in studies now like me, no worries! (Ok, now all my friends are going to say I'm being carefree again TT) There's still some time left (:

And...I shall go back to studying now :(



ps// I've decided to export my old blog posts cause some of them are really weird even I can't explain it okay TT Idk what I was thinking back then. Omg.
Only kept the more meaningful posts which I know I still type weirdly.

Think Happy Thoughts

Hook: She told him stories. He taught her to fly. How?
Wendy: You just think happy thoughts. They lift you into the air. 
Hook: Alas, I have no happy thoughts. 
Wendy: That brings you down! 
Hook: [Hook threatens to cut Wendy's throat with his hook] How else? 
Michael: Fairy dust! You need fairy dust! 
The Lost Boys: Michael! 
Hook: What of Pan? Would unhappy thoughts bring him down?
Wendy: He has no unhappy thoughts.  

- Peter Pan

Going to hand in my form to drop subject tomorrow, or rather, 8 hours later.

Decided to go with dropping Economics.

Dad called from China just now and I told him the news.

He was actually okay with it and was concerned on whether I promoted or not only. Hahha.

Anyway, it kinda sucks, cause the people in my class really have nobody to turn to to ask for advice and help.

Oh well, maybe it's karma our class was mean to the teachers?

But we were not that mean anyway.

Mostly late and not handing up work.

I mean, doesn't everyone/class does that ?!

And we only have like what, 2/3 days to decide?

Imagine if my dad didn't call back and he would not know about my decision at all.

Worse, what if my mum was overseas too?

Lol. Kinda a joke.

Grrr...

Gotta think HAPPY THOUGHTS! HAPPY THOUGHTS!!

Spent almost the whole day working on the secret project with Qihua today <: font="font">

We did quite alot of work actually, hmmm...
Shall call it Project QJ! Heh heh.

So excitingxz! Although Qihua said it was scary instead? Idk.

Back to School

School started on Friday.

And although it's just lectures, and only 2hours, I don't like it.

That explains the photo taken while I was eating breakfast. Haha.

So we only had GP and Chemistry lectures.

It was kinda boring for GP, and I felt that what they taught was too brief.

For Chemistry, I was totally lost.

We continued on alkenes and I can't remember a shit about it D:

So I was trying really hard to pay attention but in the end...

I just started doodling and amusing myself.

And at the end of the lecture, I was sleeping while this teacher went on about how we should pay attention or something, I can't remember.

Took the train home with Qihua after that, we were going to swim! (:

I was still feeling down because lectures are starting again which means I have to work hard.

Doubly hard to catch up and really do well :(

See, darling is sad too!

We had Texas Chicken for lunch!

Really fattening :( 

 I have a tummy now and my thighs are getting fatter.

But it was soooo awesomely nice, grrr.

After that we nua on the sofa for awhile, watched random shows on cable.

Dar was totally rushing me to change before it starts raining, heh.

He's upset! ><

Timer shot .

It was really hard so we gave up after a few tries :/

Hehhe, loveeeeeee <3 p="p">

Qihua really made me swim this time round.

Like really SWIM.

Normally I/we would just play around in the pool and stuff.

But I really swimmed that day. Hahha. 

Awesome way to start school ! (:

And both of us are working on this really cool thing (;

Reality and life.

Here's a picture of cute Qihua to start this post.

I was too lazy to edit it so the white balance looks abit off.

Anyway, today after collecting our promo results, we went to have sogurt at nex while waiting for time to pass before we meet up with Xinyi and Wanqi. 

But due to some communication problems, we ended up at orchard while they went to nex.

So me and Qihua decided to have lunch at Watami! (:

I ate there with my family before but it was at the Clark Quay branch.

He ordered this stone bowl beef rice thingy while I had this other beef bowl which came with a small cold soba.

My beef bowl!

Soba and this salad with amazing dressing !

We both agreed that his taste like pepper lunch while mine like yoshinoya. Haha.

We should have ordered the hotpot or teppanyaki instead :(

After lunch we walked around orchard and shopped at h&m.

I bought 2tops and 1sweater, heh.

I'm going to post the photos another day cause I've this feeling that I may exchange one of the top for something else.

Back to the topic of collecting promo results and the lengthy part;

I did get promoted :D but....

yup, life always comes with a but,

I have to drop one of my h2 subject to h1 cause I did not meet the criteria.

The criteria was to have an average of D, and mine was between D and E.

I should be happy with this result already.

Especially when Qihua pointed out a few says before,

 that I was someone who "truly enjoyed life and is very lucky".

"I only do stuffs which makes me happy and generally avoided those that made me unhappy or I disliked.

I didn't study much cause I don't like to, but still managed to somehow get decent grades.

And, I do not have a goal in life.

Or maybe I do, but it seemed too simplistic and naive to him."

I was kinda upset and frustrated this time though,

as I did not know which subject I should drop:

Physics, Chemistry or Economics.

It's really tough having to decide, and honestly, 

I only wanted to do well so that I would not have to choose which subject to choose.

And when I knew that I have to drop a subject, 

I was seriously considering to drop out of school instead.

Personally, I see no use in JC education, 

especially since we would only use maybe  5-10% of the things we learned.

I don't get how it prepares us for university, and for life.

But as Qihua put it:

"It is a way for them to test your intelligence" 

And I agree.

I just cannot accept and agree with it personally.

I mean like, why not test us with regards to what we ACTUALLY want to study.

Because most of the time, only 1 or maybe 2 subjects is related to what we want to study/work in the future.

When I'm given a subject which I have no interest in to study, I will not give it my all, I will not put in my best effort as I see no point in it.

That is why even if I was given a chance to turn back time again, 

I'm sure my grades would be around the same.

I will study, because I need to pass and promote, because I need to do well in a levels and get into university.

But I know that I have not done my best cause I don't have passion for what I'm doing.

If I love what I'm studying, I would do my very best just because I love doing it.

And that's when I achieve good results.

It doesn't work the other way round.

Some of you may feel that I should have opted for poly instead, just like what my mum said.

But I know that it will be much harder to get into a university if I studied at poly.

Yup I know, nothing satisfies me.

So now, I still have to make a choice,

Physics, Chemistry or Economics?

I guess I will be going with economics, considering our school's a level results last year.

I would love to drop physics really, I don't like Mr Lim and I don't want him to teach me for another year.

And this feeling is increasing every day.

And he's going to say I talk behind his back if he sees this.

So the next time he asks if we like him to be our teacher next year, 

I would really raise up my hand and say no.

I have given him enough respect he deserves.

Shall elaborate next time.

Now me and Andris don't know who to turn to to ask for advice.

Both our CT's are away on leave.

I don't want to speak to Mr Lim, nor Mr Low who only cares bout his bright sparks I guess.

He has his own CT anyway.

I don't think Ms Emily likes us, and Mrs Tan is nice, but I think she abit bo chap?

Hahah. Our class kinda pathetic :(

Just my two cents.

Or alot of cents.

Tomorrow's going to be a better day (: